This may be the first question that goes through your mind after you have been trying to conceive for any amount of time, or if you have begun your treatment for infertility. Infertility is a tricky condition that evokes various emotions. The stigma in our culture is that pregnancy should be “easy” and “natural”, and this can cause couples to feel inadequate and frustrated with their situation. The truth is that infertility, which affects 10% of all couples, is a disease that should attract the same emotional support as other conditions and be free of that stigma.
Nothing you have done wrong has caused your infertility. Dealing with the emotions that infertility brings out can often lead couples to the blame game. They can criticise themselves (“Oh, if I just hadn’t waited so long”) or their partners (“Well, if he/she had just done this …”), when the truth of the situation is that the blame game will only hurt your relationship at a time when you need to support one another the most.
Take your infertility factor, whether it is related to the male or female or both, as your united diagnosis. Don’t make it a “my” or “your” issue, become a united front! You will probably feel sadness and pain, find comfort in your partner and offer comfort to him or her.
The journey of infertility can be long, with highs and lows. Knowing that it’s you and your partner against the world will help you during these times.